This is an overview of why I decided to resign from my school counselor job in Palm Beach County, Florida this past July after 8 years (2013-2021) of employment. At the beginning of the pandemic, my principal forced me to abandon my counseling duties in favor of physically covering a 2nd grade class for a teacher whom he had allowed to remain virtual. In September 2021, Districts scrambled to create an equitable protocol to determine who will be able to work from home and who would need to physically return to campus… and that protocol was for that decision to be at the principal's discretion. As I’m sure you can imagine, this became a very clear exercise in favoritism. After this blatant misuse of authority, I realized that I couldn’t continue to work for a system that is determined to perpetuate social inequality by refusing to hold its leaders accountable thereby perpetuating the misogynistic foundation on which the education system was built.
It’s been over a year since I quit and I am finally in a healthy mindset to be able to properly convey my experiences; ultimately, finally leaving a job that was taking a drastic negative toll on my physical and mental health was the best thing I could have done for myself, and I want to acknowledge the privilege I have to even have been able to make this choice. As educators leave the profession in record numbers, I feel it necessary to share my story to add to that narrative. I want to shine a spotlight on how the public education system exploits the kind hearts and good natures of its staff members. The public education system relies on the unpaid labor that teachers spend beyond their contracted hours, placing those that are able to volunteer their time on a pedestal and ridiculing those that follow the agreed upon conditions of their contract.
So, what does a School Counselor do? Unlike mainstream representation, we do so much more than make schedule changes, oversee graduation requirements, and share trite motivational motivational quotes. School Counseling is one of the few positions on a school campus that requires a Masters degree to be eligible for the position. I received my Masters of Education and Education Specialist degrees in Mental Health Counseling and Marriage and Family Therapy from the University of Florida in 2012 and my Bachelors of Arts in Psychology was obtained at UCF in 2010.
The goal of a School Counselor at the elementary level is to promote the academic, career, and social/emotional development of all students through a Comprehensive School Counseling Program. I met these needs by providing lessons to whole classes of students during Guidance class, creating small targeted counseling skills groups for kids that needed more support, meeting with parents, collaborating with teachers and staff, and consulting with community organizations to benefit and better meet the needs of our population. The intangible, long-term nature of our work clearly doesn’t mesh well with a system that requires immediate results.
The School District of Palm Beach County (SDPBC) is the tenth-largest public school district in the United States, and the fifth largest school district in Florida. I am certified by the Florida Department of Education in Elementary Education (K-6) and School Counseling (PK-12). I was the only Certified School Counselor at an Elementary School in Delray Beach with approximately 900 students enrolled because the budget only allows for one. The American School Counseling Association suggests a ratio of 1 counselor per every 250 students as being appropriate.
Palm Beach County is also where I graduated high school, most of my immediate family resides, and where I lived at the time these stories took place. I grew up wanting to be a teacher; my dad’s been teaching middle school math for over 25 years and my mom is a school’s lead administrative assistant, so having a career in education was pretty much destiny for me and, like most educators, I feel that working with kids is a calling that you can’t ignore.
I was hired as a School Counselor at my most recent elementary school in 2017 by a female principal whom I connected with instantly; she even hired me on the spot! She saw my desire to build an effective counseling program and trusted me enough to essentially give me free reign in my solo department. She also expressed that it was time for fresh eyes to oversee several of the District mandated initiatives and assigned me to serve as my school’s 504 Designee, SBT/RTI Leader, and SWPBS Internal Coach, which meant I was now the case manager for a revolving door of approximately 100 students and thusly responsible for the countless hours of meetings, paperwork, and unique problem solving that each case required. Eager to please my new boss by impressing her with my ability to multitask, I complied. As the year progressed, I felt that there was an emphasis being placed on moving students along through the process to receive ESE support increasing and the interest in providing preventative mental health support decreasing. I did voice my concerns regarding the limited counseling services I was able to provide because my time on campus was being spent handling extraneous work functions. She promised to lessen my load and to take another look at my schedule next school year.
During the summer of 2018, my school was notified that we’d be welcoming a new principal, Mr. Principal, and I was excited for the opportunity to voice my concerns to fresh ears, and, ideally, begin to fulfill my actual job duties. At the beginning of that school year, we met to discuss my role and, after initial conversations with him, I was happy to begin SY2018 providing Guidance on the Fine Arts Rotation for the lower grades, but, unfortunately, I was still in charge of the same initiatives as the previous year, and, although I’d spend countless hours on campus after contract hours, I began to fall behind on my RTI and 504 cases. Ultimately, he chose to remove my Guidance class from the Fine Arts Rotation for the rest of that school year, eliminating direct social and emotional learning from the school’s curriculum, rather than designate another capable professional to handle the extraneous tasks that I was “volun-told” to do by my previous Administration.
The following (19/20) school year began the same as the previous - he decided to put me back on the Fine Arts Rotation for the primary grades along with the same amount of initiatives on my shoulders. I had met with Administration numerous times expressing my frustration with the absolute impossibility for one individual to oversee so many programs and to still be expected to be an effective educator. I presented them with itemized data that broke down how I spent my time each day, including the additional hours that were necessary for completing SBT/RTI and 504 files with fidelity. Again, my pragmatic and data-driven presentation was refused without discussion.
The true catalyst for me to finally resign began in March 2020, when the District decided to provide virtual instruction for the remainder of the year due to the Coronavirus. I knew that the only thing that mattered was being available for my students to discuss their feelings during that unprecedented time, so I made the unilateral decision to solely focus on providing Guidance lessons for every grade level. I was returning phone calls and emails at all hours of the day. I had private sessions with kids that I had never spoken to individually before, yet they needed space to explore their emotions. Admittedly, I welcomed the much needed distraction from the world’s panic, and even voluntarily assisted with various administrative issues as well as made videos to boost staff morale, showcase our volunteers, and to recognize our 5th graders.
Before the 20/21 school year began, I scheduled a meeting with the Administration to discuss my concerns yet again. I provided new data that focused on students that were requesting and receiving counseling services, and emphasized that it would be impossible for me to complete all of the unnecessary additional duties on top of my counseling duties, especially not virtually, and, according to the data and subjective reports: counseling was critical! I simply wanted to perform my hired job function: to be a school counselor! The purpose of this pre-school meeting was to share the year’s Comprehensive School Counseling Program Plan, which is used to outline and highlight counseling related events and initiatives, and I enthusiastically expressed my intention to begin to work towards having our program recognized by the American School Counselor Association (ASCA). They appreciated my ambitious idea and, yes, they did agree to finally allow me to provide Guidance for every grade level on the Fine Arts Rotation, but without truly alleviating anything from my workload. They assured me that they had a few ideas as to who could absorb my additional roles, but refused to let me in on their thought process. I expressed my excitement to finally be able to provide education and support for all grade levels and made sure that they were aware that I was going to prioritize my main job function above all of the extraneous ones and that I would complete the others to the best of my ability within the constraints of my contract.
The year began online in August 2020. I provided counseling and Guidance and I was the happiest I had ever been in my position. Once the initial pandemic panic subsided, the District began trickling out disjointed information about how they’d handle employee requests to remain virtual teaching rather than return to campus once it was deemed safe to do so. There were multiple categories we could apply for depending on the individual’s personal circumstances and health, so I began to obtain paperwork and documentation from my doctors. Although I didn’t have any of the medical diagnoses listed on the CDC website, I have other diagnoses which catching COVID could complicate. I also have elderly grandparents whom I assist that I would be heartbroken to inadvertently introduce a deadly pathogen to. Regardless, I had faith that the District would keep the promise they made to their 10,000+ teachers to allow us to each make the personal decision that would best serve our individual circumstances, and my fear eased a bit, assuming that the health and safety of their staff was their top priority.
I applied for remote work on September 15th. On the morning of September 18th, my excitement upon receiving the email from the District approving my remote work application (9/17/20 at 11:36pm) immediately turned to confusion because directly underneath was an email from Mr. Principal (at 8:08am) which informed me that he did not have a remote work assignment available for me and I would need to report to campus when it reopens. I filed an appeal online at 8:56am which was then inexplicably denied at 5:01pm. Although I was disappointed to not have the opportunity to remain remote, I knew that my absence, whether in person or remote, would ultimately sadden my students, and I informed the Administration that I would reluctantly return to campus.
On September 21st, I greeted my students with socially distant greetings and a smile beneath my mask. The students looked truly happy to be back on campus, and making them feel as safe and comfortable as possible was our top priority. In contrast, the negative staff morale was equally as palpable as rumors regarding absent teachers circulated, unfair workloads were placed upon others, and minimal communication from administration made many teachers weary. In spite of this, my colleagues embodied the dystopian catch phrase “all hands on deck” that was uttered by teachers and Board members alike during those first few days back at school, and remained professional and caring toward our beloved students.
I received an email on September 23rd from my principal with the subject “meeting,” containing a single sentence to stop by his office at the end of the day. I was used to receiving casually toned emails from Administration instructing me to see them for a few minutes to touch base regarding students or situations. I approached his open door. I walked in and sat down, we exchanged pleasantries, and he proceeded to ask me questions about an SBT/RTI file. I was unfamiliar with this student’s particular case, but obviously familiar with SBT/RTI paperwork, so I answered to the best of my ability. I reminded him that now that I am providing Guidance and counseling to all grade levels, I’m left with scarcely an hour to return phone calls and emails related to that, and will no longer handle non-counseling related tasks.
As I began to stand up, Mr. Principal nonchalantly informed me that he needed me to cover a second grade class because we were short staffed. I told him that I wouldn’t mind volunteering my lunch or planning time to cover until a permanent solution was found. He informed me that he needed me to cover for the entire day, every day and this assignment began the following day for the foreseeable future because I hold an Elementary Education Certificate. Perplexed - I sat back down and said that I needed to process his request for a few moments - I asked what would happen to my Guidance classes and the students that I am already scheduled to see? His response was that he would get a substitute. I pointed out that I was the only person on campus with a School Counseling Certification, so, by his own logic, I am the only person qualified to provide services congruent with that role. He reiterated, matter-of-factly, that this was the assignment and that is what I must report to work to do the following day. My mind swirled with sadness and frustration as it was clear that my pleas fell on deaf ears. I snarkily replied that he would need an additional substitute because I refused to abandon my counseling responsibilities. As I turned around to leave, I was met with the shocked stares of the few colleagues that happened to have been waiting their turn outside the principal’s door that was apparently left open.
I was completely disheartened. It was clear that the students weren’t going to have access to a Certified School Counselor for the foreseeable future whether I was on campus or not, so I used the following day to collect my thoughts. I emailed my Principal in an attempt to gain clarity regarding his decision and to assert the need for my profession. No response. I took the following day off. Still no response. My Administration continued to fail to respond to my multiple email and phone call attempts. My bank of accrued leave hours dwindled and I didn’t have a choice but to apply for a sick leave of absence at that point because, as per District policy, that’s what needs to happen after 10 consecutive absences. I used the documentation that I had received from my doctors to apply for FMLA, but it was deemed insufficient to qualify. I am still unsure why I was denied because I know that other teachers in the District did receive FMLA for the same diagnosis and I wasn’t given an option to rectify whatever needed to be fixed.
After 2 weeks without communication from my Administration, I sent Mr. Principal an email on October 2nd asking that he reconsider my original request to allow me to work remotely but, if not, then I would need his signature on my Leave Request form. With zero response, I resent the email on October 7th. That email was ignored by him as well. On October 8th, 2020, I received an email from the District confirming that I was officially on an unpaid leave of absence.
I was incredibly depressed immediately after this ordeal and I spent the following days in bed consumed with anxiety for my professional future. I cried whenever I thought about how such a core part of my identity was stripped away from me through a total miscarriage of authority. On top of the emotional burden, since my FMLA was denied, I had to pay hundreds of dollars for my insurance coverage to carry me through this uncertain time. My entire world was crumbling beneath me and there was nothing that I could do.
I managed to collect my thoughts and sent an email to the School Board Members and the School District’s Executive Leadership on November 10, 2020, that outlined the unfair chain of miscommunication.
I received a phone call from an instructional superintendent, Ms. Supervisor, a few days after sending the email in an attempt to reach a mutually satisfactory solution so I could get back to work as a School Counselor. She was already aware of a few of my concerns due to conversations we’ve had in passing over the years when she was visiting campus, and she assured me that she’d investigate the situation further and call me as soon as she had some information to share. I reiterated aspects of my letter and she feigned empathy.
Two weeks later, before Thanksgiving 2020, she called me to say that she reviewed my letter with my Principal. The conclusion, after thorough investigation, was that he didn’t breach any rules by making that request of me and that I misunderstood his directive: he was asking me to temporarily cover the 2nd grade class, and, because his request wasn’t given in writing, there is no way to truly determine what transpired during that conversation. She offered to conduct a mediation session between him and I because, on behalf of the School District of Palm Beach County, the only solution to this issue would be for me to return to campus immediately. I declined the mediation and the appalling offer. She then provided the contact information for the Equal Employment Opportunity department so I could file a formal complaint about my principal regarding my experiences and wished me well as I continued my leave of absence.
Perhaps the most uncomfortable comment that was made during those phone calls was that Ms. Supervisor ascertained by way of me having been so adamant about my distaste for absorbing extraneous duties over the years, that I must not “like” my principal. The implication behind that remark shirks the District’s responsibility in its mistreatment of my case by insinuating that I chose to take a leave of absence as a way to avoid his directive like a petulant child. This accusation undermines the years of education, experience, and exceptional evaluations on which I’ve built my career.
Over the years, I brought data and information to my principal’s attention in attempts to educate him about the difficulty I was experiencing completing my non-counseling related duties and the need for them to be given to another staff member. Regardless of how many times he’d refused to delegate my extraneous tasks elsewhere, juggled my schedule around to better serve those tasks, invalidated the data that I’d present to him to support the need for a Comprehensive School Counseling Program, I clung to the hope that I may eventually be able to exclusively fulfill my job function. Surely, there had to be a school that would not only value student mental health, but also that of its employees.
My personal agenda has been, and always will be, to reduce the stigma surrounding discussing mental health and to lend an empathic ear to those marginalized due to society’s failure to internalize the grim reality that approximately one in six children meet criteria for a diagnosable mental health issue. I was that one in six. I often wonder how my academic life would have been different had my own undiagnosed ADHD been properly recognized and treated in childhood. The concept of early detection leading to increased positive outcomes is relevant across the health sciences; why would mental health be any different? School counselors are usually gatekeepers for other services that may be more appropriate for students that need more intensive treatment, such as therapy or psychiatry, and are specifically educated to identify and support this delicate topic. Preventative education and trauma informed care are the keys to making an impact to reducing that sobering statistic.
Before the pandemic, whenever I told someone that I was an elementary School Counselor, I was often met with questions about what young children could possibly need to discuss with a counselor. Now, given the collective trauma we’re experiencing, the answer is a bit more obvious. Talking to students about negative emotions and helping them to practice positive coping strategies comes naturally for me, regardless of the state of the world. The added layer of pandemic-related stressors meant that there would be an influx of students requiring mental health support: and I even had data to back that claim up! The emotional space that a counselor holds for a child to express their inner world is sacred and I am honored whenever a student chooses to share a profound experience with me and eliminating the only role on campus trained to do so was ignorant at best and spiteful at worst.
The pandemic has made the holes in the antiquated US public education system much more apparent as educators leave the profession due to increasing demands and zero compensation in record numbers. Educators are notoriously selfless, but at whose gain? Are we really showing up for our students as our best selves if we neglect ourselves? My personal opinion is that Districts won’t financially compensate educators appropriately until we stop volunteering our time outside of our contract hours. Ultimately, your Administration doesn’t have the capacity to reimburse you, they have their own professional and personal lives, and you will never get back the time you spent going above and beyond. In the past, there were some years when I’d voluntarily stayed on campus during non-contracted hours to work on school-related projects and tasks. It seems that because the Administration had grown used to the benefits of my misrepresented productivity and therefore refused to be flexible with their inflated expectations once I requested my personal time to belong to me once again. At leadership meetings on campus, I would plead with my colleagues and Administration to take the lead on one of the several initiatives forced on my plate, and, being the youngest woman without children at the table, I was consistently denied, as if my personal time was less valuable. The public education system capitalizes on the selflessness of its employees and relies on their continuing sacrifice of their free time and energy beyond their contractual obligations to shoulder the burden of increasing demands rather than using incidents like mine to model humility and progress.
EPILOGUE:
An entire year has passed and I can only infer that the District must’ve found me so expendable that it’s not even worth their effort to provide further conversation. I’m not naive to think that I’ve crossed any of these peoples’ minds, especially not now, but I’d be lying if I said that it doesn’t sting to think that seeing my name on rosters and paperwork didn’t jog anyones’ memories enough to communicate with me. It’s obvious that the District maintains the stance that my Principal was justified in making the decision to capriciously change my job assignment simply by way of possessing the authority to do so. Chalking my experience up to a “he said, she said” style misunderstanding highlights the inherently misogynistic foundation on which the public education system was built, and, therefore makes them not culpable for the domino effect that the ineffective communication caused. I still have no insight into why a virtual position wasn’t manifested for me as was done for several others or why I was chosen to physically cover the class of second graders whose teacher was granted just that. Before I left my Principal’s office and with tears in my eyes I told him that I needed to take a seat and a few moments to process his request because it made me uncomfortable. I would imagine that anybody in a supervisory role, especially one that directly impacts children, would at least provide clarity in the moment for an employee distraught by a misunderstood directive rather than allow the situation to escalate to the point where my situation did. Regardless, the silence from Administration that followed that meeting wasn’t just unprofessional, it was unkind. If temporarily changing assignments was what needed to be done for the sake of my school community in the short term for the best outcome for the long term, of course I would have complied, as I had done with every other assignment outside of my scope of work I’d begrudgingly completed.
The School District of Palm Beach County is responsible for educating roughly 200,000 students each year. I would imagine an institution with such wide reaching influence would have progressed a bit beyond its archaic foundation by now, but I’m far from surprised that it hasn’t. Mediocre administrators continue to be reassigned from the helm of one school to another with little consequence and a comparable salary while teachers and support staff are bullied into submission or making themselves scarce. This is the same District that had to host multiple meetings to decide how to handle a high school principal that refused to acknowledge the Holocaust as a factual, historical event, with the proposed solution being to rehire him with backpay equivalent to three times that of a beginning teacher, before making the correct decision to fire him. As long as the divide in power remains this large and the District continues to fill leadership positions with members of their Good Ole Boys Club, our most vulnerable population, our students, will suffer.
I want to acknowledge the immense privilege I have to have even been able to take time away from work without pay only to ultimately decide to quit and pursue a whole new career. I feel that it's my responsibility as a cisgendered white person to recognize the advantages that these parts of my identity have granted me. Even with those protective factors, I've experienced countless aggressions disrespecting my identity as a queer, Jewish, neurodivergent woman. I am aware of the huge impact that generational trauma and systemic oppression have on marginalized populations, especially on people of color and members of the LGBTQIA+ community. There are innumerable reasons why employees stay in abusive environments, but those unjust barriers make it exponentially more difficult for these exploited individuals to even consider leaving the financial safety that working for the government provides. I'm fortunate that when forced to decide between continuing to collect a paycheck or continuing to collect trauma, I was able to prioritize my mental health. I've decided to share my narrative with the goal to raise awareness of the racism, sexism, ableism, and homophobia that are still very much prevalent amongst those staff members in power in hopes of positive improvements to the public education system.
In this day and age, with equality in the workplace and equity in the classroom being such relevant topics, the District’s lack of culpability is unacceptable. The District’s misogynistic underpinnings serve to bully staff members into submission and countless educators are forced to remain quiet when met with the mistreatment they receive at the hands of their administrators for fear or retaliation. If the School District of Palm Beach County is truly committed to transforming our system by hearing and elevating underrepresented voices, sharing power, recognizing and eliminating bias, and redistributing resources to provide equitable outcomes, they must begin dismantling structures rooted in white advantage, but, of course, that would entail examining, breaking down, and rebuilding the very system from which they are maintaining their power.